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Nick's Funny Time Travel (UPDATE: Jan28, pg 3) Silly humors, READ this! XD

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ATTENTION: This is a sequel of “Prince Nicolas’s Stories in AV2”. This story is based on “Ahriman’s Prophecy” but the story is different from the game plot. The setting is after you finished the game. Thank you for reading it.

 

Note: This story is very concise and simple (no longer formal and descriptive).

 

---

 

Chapter One (Time Travel)

 

(As in Prince Nicolas’s sweet slumber on his room, in the midst of his dream, he found himself in the Dream World for the second time…)

 

This place is enchanting, everywhere is purple, magical music is heard from afar… I wonder the water is safe to drink… I’m a little parched right now…

 

(There comes the dreamer, who Prince Nicolas met her before in his previously first same dream)

 

The dreamer spoke: “Prince Nicolas, I’m Talia Maurva, also known as the Druid of Dream, I know everything from you. I would like you to have a Time Travel.”

 

“Er, how come you chose me to have it? Why?”

 

“It’s final. Here, the Druid of Time will shift you to the past, when no one could recognize you. Good luck! Oh before I slip off my words, remember to keep that scented bag safely. Good luck again.”

 

Before I could say anything, I was being transferred from Dream World to somewhere unexpected…

 

 

…to be con’d…

 

---

 

Expect funny things happen in Chapter 2 (New Profile) :)

Thank you, I would like you to say what do you think of the start OK?

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Don’t blame me if this is not funny. Thank you for reading it. :)

 

---

 

Chapter 2 (New Profile)

 

(Prince Nicolas was unconscious. When he opened his eyes, a lady (call girl) was fondling his cheek and giggling…)

 

The call girl spoke: “Oh hee hee… Girls! Here comes a nice-looking customer!”

 

Other call girls replied: “Oh yes, he got crystal blue eyes. It’s rare!”

 

I ran away and shocked. I realized I’m in the brothel. Damn, why the dreamer would place me in this humiliating place.

 

The boss, Rita, came to me and scolded: “If you don’t have any pennies, now get lost!”

 

I felt insulted and argued: “Watch your tone! I’m Prince Nicolas Pendragon!”

 

Rita laughed and teased: “What? There’s no such ‘Prince Nicolas’ in Royal Pendragon family! You should know that, you moron! Kick this scum out!”

 

Two brawny men dragged me harshly and kicked me out. I grunted. It was painful and my palms bled! I never have these wounds that are so serious before… I tried to use Healing II, but to no avail… Well, I think I’m “magic-less”.

 

While I was outside, a snobbish couple scoffed at me: “Ahahaha…A guy with a royal robe is penniless and kicked out from that scum place! He’s how insulting to our nobles!”

 

I was wondering what city I’m now. I asked a flute player nearby: “Erm, may I know the name of this city?”

 

He was annoyed and snorted: “Hmph! This is the grandest city of Thais, silly fool!”

 

Let’s see if I’ve any pennies… No! My pockets are empty! Let’s see my backpack… No! There are only papers, a quill, and a scented bag. Wait, the scented bag? It’s the same one after I slipped it away from the ride… Weird. But how cruel the dreamer would be! I went to a corner and sniffed.

 

(Oh how pathetic Prince Nicolas would be, especially when he lost his princy status…)

 

I calmed down. The scented bag performed “aromatherapy”, I suppose. Then, my tummy cried out loudly and it seemed as if it talked (I’m crazy again?): “Nicolas, Nicolas, I’m hungry now, I’ll cry noisily if you don’t feed me…”

 

A voice came out nowhere (I guess I’m completely insane): “Don’t be stupid Nicolas! Do something!”

 

Okay, first thing to do is to ask who am I (I forgot who am I??). I questioned to a young man, who looks like a farmer: “Do you know who I am?”

 

He replied: “For heaven’s sake! I know you nothing! Have you seen a doctor? He could treat your crazy or whatever lost memory.”

 

I asked other citizens too (that’s stupid I know) and I got the same response. I never expect the ancient Thais before the world was destroyed by Ahriman would be so ugly and dirty, especially the existence of that dratted brothel! I swear I’ll demolish it! Well, I miss my current home in future; here don’t have beautiful clocks…

 

So, I decided to write my new profile (in case I forget) SOLELY for this “driving-me-crazy” world.

 

 

My Profile

Name:

A) Prince Nicolas Pendragon? (No one believes me >.<)

B) Nicolas? (Same?)

C) Nicky? (Yucks like kinky)

D) Nick? (Short and sweet!)

I chose D. So Nick, call me Nick, just Nick without Pendragon is ok (UPDATE!)

 

Age: 22 (I’m still young and handsome, ER-HEM!)

Profession: Time Traveler (UPDATE! Not White Mage because no magic already! Darn that dreamer…)

Home: Thais (of course you silly, forever and ever!)

Likes: Thais, Clocks (Same…)

Detests: Witches, warlocks, humiliations (UPDATE!)

Quest(s): Currently unknown, but to get out from the past! (Anyone could help?)

 

All right, Prince Nicolas, no! It’s Nick, yes! Nick, it’s time to find work, or else you’ll die from hunger!

 

 

…to be con’d…

 

---

 

Next is Chapter 3 (Getting Employed).

Thank you and I would like you to say how do you feel about this story OK?

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Hah! I didn't like the first chapter that much, but the second was great. And the part where Nick is in a brothel? That has to be extremely humiliating. And I like that you popped him into the time of Ahriman's Prophecy 'cause that would likely cause Nick mroe humiliation and embarrassment. Heh.

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LMAO at Nick in the brothel! i found the first chapter too short, but i love the second one! and i have a feeling i'll like the third even better; he's getting employed! 0_o

 

will he ever become Prince Nicolas again? i think i'm missing his princy status as much as he does lol!

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Sorry for late update. I’m trying to do this very good. There’re many scenes here and I separated it for convenience of reading. But still, not much people interest in Prince Nicolas, neither this story… (-_-) I added the face expressions too! Enjoy for the new added style. ^_^

 

Note: There are only “ass” words here. If you couldn’t tolerate this, please do not report and blame me. Thank you. I enjoy writing this funny story. :)

 

---

Chapter 3 (Getting Employed I: Nick As A Temporary Janitor)

 

I was wondering which kind of job is suitable for me (my princy attitude… >.< ) It looks like everything is commoners’ work. Darn, I do not wish to do something dirty and tedious. I want something that graceful and “royal-ish”. Have me offered by graceful jobs of courtesy, I shall have him rewards and gratitude. Oops, I should remove my royal accent and be with the peasants… (O_O)

 

Sorta like: “Hey, how ya doin? Me kinda fine here. Needa go now. See ya ‘round, will ya?” \(~_~)/

 

………

 

“Hey, dude! Are there job vacancies?!” I enquired to an old woman, trying to be a friendly peasant and with handy friendly wave. \(^_^)

 

“Young golden-haired teen! Rude to old folks! Outta my way! Shoo! Or else I smack your butt!” she angrily replied.

 

………

 

Discourteous? Oops, rude? Hmm… (?_?)’\ […scratching my head with question marks…]

 

An unknown voice shouted at me (Am I insane?). “This tone isn’t appropriate for elderly, fool!”

 

Okay… But I should stick back my former polite but HUMBLE tone OK? “Nick…Nick…grrg gruug gruu…” Oh… My tummy was “crying” to me again… (>.<)

 

………

 

Wait, I saw a paper like advertisement adhered to the wall of a building. It looks like it’s offering a job. Hmm… “Wilbur’s Room Cleaners and Janitors WANTED!” (O_O)

 

That nutty voice sang ridiculously: “Woohoo! Let’s go, Nick and his crying-baby tummy! We’re together…together…and gather…”

 

“Hey, shut up!” I shouted. \(-_-``) […oops, everyone was watching…]

 

I knocked the door at Wilbur’s house. Wilbur, a moderately huge man with big round nose and mouth, and green hair spoke: “Yes? What you want? No solicitors please!” (-o- )

 

“Okay, I want to be your rooms’ janitor and cleaner. Will you hire me?”

 

“Hehe. Sure. Come with me first.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“This is Room 1. There are 4 rooms. I want to you to clean up the toilet in Room 1 first.”

 

“I would like to as-”

 

“Shut up, do your work and prove it!” (O.o.O)

 

“But, I would like to as-”

 

“Hey, enough of obscenities and rudeness. Go do it!”

 

“Mr. Wilbur, I would like to as-” (-_-``)

 

“Cut it off! No ass-ing around! You should be assed! Now, move your ass!”

 

“I really, really want to ‘question’!!! ‘Ask’, in another word!” /(@_@)\

 

“Oh I see. Well, what troubles you, idle ass-ing man?” (--_--)

 

“The toilet is flooded with ‘brownie’ things…” (V_V)

 

“Oh brownies! I love it those sweet heart-robbing desserts! I’ll order one from Maya’s Bakery House tomorrow!” (^O^) […silly greedy big piggy mouth…should be like this instead, (^(oo)^)… ]

 

“No, it’s those filthy poops!” (-_-``)’\

 

“Pops you mean? I don’t get it… Do you mean your dad (pop) in the toilet? IMPOSSIBLE! No one enter the rooms without my key!” (>o<)

 

“NO! I MEAN those brown-colored, dirty, smelly, SHIT!” \(>.<``)

 

“Don’t call them brown, brownies, pops, pop, or whatever. They’re chocolates! Just think of they’re another sweet heart-robbing desserts again.” (^O^) […every time he mentioned about desserts, his mouth will be widely opened like piggy nose. Why don’t he eats the shit?…]

 

“That won’t work.” (-_-``)

 

“Oh yeah, read the fairytale of ‘Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’ before? That’ll work! Coincidentally, my name is WILbur, and WILly Wonka is the owner of the chocolate factory. We share the same first name, WIL!!! Wait! Okay, here’s my black wig, purple hat and coat and I wore it! See? We’re twins does it?” (^o^)

 

“Yeah, but-“

 

“Deal! I dunno your name, okay, I’ll name you Charlie! Yes Charlie, welcome to Wil’s Chocolate Factory and picks those chocolates right now!” (^O^) […again…]

 

“My name is NICK! Not CHARLIE!” \(O_O )

 

“Before I forget, the more you pick, the more pennies you’ll get! So it’s good to pick with your both hands, MOUTH, and ONE FOOT of course! Or else, how can you walk, jump or leap or whatever you figure out your own to move around kay?” (^o^)

 

“… (speechless)” (-_-``)

 

“Oh yes, leap properly. As you jump, the force may cause the shit flies around and have you a bite on that!!! Haha, just think that’s chocolate, and then it’ll be fine! Any questions?” (O o O)

 

“I quit!” (`@_@`)

 

“Fine! Don’t come back with empty stomach and beg for food. I’ll have you those ‘chocolates’ instead!” (O o O)

 

………

 

Oh, night already… Fast indeed. I’m parched yet extremely famished. I should’ve drunk the tap water from that silly “Wilbur’s Chocolate Factory” toilet… I’ve almost no energy to walk. I don’t want to cry because I want save some water amount in my body… If my tears are really wanted to come out, I’ll lick them! Don’t laugh; you’ll do it if you’re in my shoes… I’m finding water, yes found it! Glug glug glug… Ah, the days are like heavens, seemingly wonderful and blissful… I thought I’ll never have this enjoyment anymore… Oh stop it! Seek job tomorrow or else you die, Nick!

 

(Nick slept at the street corner, a beggar approached to him and tried to pick his pocket and it turned out empty. The beggar said angrily: “What the heck, a noble of no pennies and with fragrant cologne? He’s beggar of new fashion!” Amazingly, Nick never get torn on his clothes, neither his body gets smelly. He’s much like a god? Make no sense!)

 

…to be con’d (Chapter 3: Getting Employed II)…

 

Thank you. I would like you say out what do you think this time OK? =3

I love this face expression. Each time I use that. I reminded of cute wolfie Omega. =3

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Woah. As in WOAH O_O The part with Nick trying to speak like a peasant was so.. strange. Yet funny :lol: I find the overuse of smileys distracting. Maybe you could tone it down a bit?

And there was this one sentence:

I’m parched yet extremely famished.

That should be changed to and.

Anyway, now the story is less serious, and more funny! And I giggle-snorted (yes, I happen to do that sometimes) when Nick said he'd drink his tears. Even know I'm biting my lip to keep from laughing! Hah, and bringing in Willy Wonka was pure genius. Totally.

The end of the chapter had to be probably the best part. Beggar of new fashion indeed :D

All in all, awesome update :goodjob:

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Thank you guys! Oh hey, DarkPrincess gave me the first comment! YEAH!

 

@puppis: I would like to thank you again for reminding me that. I will remove some face expressions. About the slang, I forgot to explain in this post but the next post instead... Sorry for that XD

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"“Okay, I want to be your rooms’ janitor and cleaner. Will you hire me?”

 

“Hehe. Sure. Come with me first.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“This is Room 1. There are 4 rooms. I want to you to clean up the toilet in Room 1 first.”

 

“I would like to as-”

 

“Shut up, do your work and prove it!” (O.o.O)

 

“But, I would like to as-”

 

“Hey, enough of obscenities and rudeness. Go do it!”

 

“Mr. Wilbur, I would like to as-” (-_-``)

 

“Cut it off! No ass-ing around! You should be assed! Now, move your ass!”

 

“I really, really want to ‘question’!!! ‘Ask’, in another word!” /(@_@)\

 

“Oh I see. Well, what troubles you, idle ass-ing man?” (--_--)

 

“The toilet is flooded with ‘brownie’ things…” (V_V)

 

“Oh brownies! I love it those sweet heart-robbing desserts! I’ll order one from Maya’s Bakery House tomorrow!” (^O^) […silly greedy big piggy mouth…should be like this instead, (^(oo)^)… ]

 

“No, it’s those filthy poops!” (-_-``)’\

 

“Pops you mean? I don’t get it… Do you mean your dad (pop) in the toilet? IMPOSSIBLE! No one enter the rooms without my key!” (>o<

 

“NO! I MEAN those brown-colored, dirty, smelly, SHIT!” \(>.<``)"

 

Funniest quote ever xD

10/10 dude =3

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Sorry, this time has no much humor compared to last one… Nick is practicing peasants' slang, so might be a little sound weird. :)

 

---

 

Chapter 3 (Getting Employed II: Nick and the Beggar)

 

The cockerel sang his morning song. The sun has risen from the horizon. I whined idly: “Aaawww… How could the night pass so fast…? I’ll kill that cockerel for being discourteous! (Again, repeat my royal slang…) I still haven’t fully recovered my fatigue… I don’t care! I’ll sleep again… Oops, I shouldn’t talk nor breathe heavily as they’ll expel the water (steam) from my body… Okay, stop talking! Yes shush! Quiet please! Silly me! I should talk by heart, not by mouth.”

 

Now speaking in my heart… (Searching around for toothbrush while eyes are barely open…)

 

I shouted: “Erm, where’s my toothbrush? Lazy maid! Oops, silly me! I’m homeless now! Oops again, shouldn’t talk…”

 

Speak in heart again… Now my teeth of pearly white sure will turn to darkly chocolate! NO! Don’t mention about that crazy piggy Wilbur’s Chocolate Factory again! NEVER! But why ancient Thais people are silly and nutty?

 

………

 

Let’s see is there any advertisement… As I was walking without paying much attention to my path, I bumped to a stinky beggar, with lots of “mushrooms” growing from his head or bushy hair and flies flying around, and realized that I need to dodge him and shouted: “Eeee yucks! Get off from me, dirty!” (You know how slow my reaction is when hungry?) (>.<`)

 

The beggar giggled and shouted back: “Hehe… Too late, I’ll take all your pennies while I cast my power ‘Stinky Stench’ to you hehehe… Oh wait! YOU again! The beggar of new fashion!”

 

What you mean? ME, beggar of new fashion? Talk silly craps. I'm no beggar! Also, there’s no such power ‘Stinky Stench’!

 

“I know! I better ‘cause me no MP but you no MP, HP (very hungry and feeble), and of course GP (gold point) too! How dare you trick me last night!”

 

“I don’t get what you mean, sir. Oops you’re no sir! You’re scum!” (Damn that noble accent) (-_-``)

 

“I’m coming…”

 

“I’ll swear I’ll cast ‘Sunshine’ on you if you touch me and make you sleep! Oh yes, the sun ray will help to disinfect the germs from your body! You should thank me haha!”

 

“Hehe… Go ahead. I’m waiting!”

 

(Casting ‘Sunshine’ towards the beggar, but turned out nothing!) “What!?!? I forgot I’m magic-less! Damn!” (-_-``)

 

“Ahahahahaha… You’re not just stupid and silly, but also arrogant! YOU ARE THE SCUM! Hahahahaha…” (>. O .<)

 

I ran away immediately while his eyes shut when laughing. I’m SMART! (^_^)V […peace out…]

 

“I laughed til my stomach pain- Eh? Where did he go? He’s lucky this time, I’ll find him someday! I WILL!”

 

………

 

Well, let’s see is there job vacancy in the tavern… The chef (boss) said no… (V_V)

 

I left the tavern. Here comes a noble lady of brunette (time to practice peasants’ accent yeah!), I talked: “G’day. May I know is there job vacancies available lately?”

 

“Good afternoon, gentleman. I’ve heard of the bakery in the noble section.”

 

(Oops, she called me gentleman, means I’m not typical peasant yet…but) “Thank you.” I thanked her with a bow of gratitude. (^_^)

 

“STOP THAT! You’re not a prince anymore, need no princy bows! It’s weird for a gentleman gives a bow unless you’re interested to that girl, silly!” that “driving-me-crazy” voice in this “driving-me-crazy” world shouted crazily like a mad woman again…:

 

“WHAT!?!? MAD WOMAN!?!?” ‘\(@_@)’\

 

“Oops…sorry…” /(V_V)\

 

“Well, I’m Talia. Sorry for not informing you that I’m a bad joker to play pranks on you. You know, life being a druid is boring. So I planned to have a gathering of all druids to make jokes on you!!

 

“You silly Dreamer! $%#*%&*@%! Oops shouldn’t scold that…everyone is looking…” (-_-``)’\

 

“Don’t worry I won’t be angry. BUT! You can’t change the history (past) but you can change the future, means you can die. So be careful. I can’t watch you all the times because I need to give you privacy.”

 

“Why?”

 

“DO you want me to SEE you pee or passing motion or whatever with exposing your private part? SILLY!”

 

“OF COURSE NO! But, when will you return me back to my world?”

 

“You need not to ask that now. Find a job first. I’ll make your world very colorful and funny, don’t worry! Haha. Bye!”

 

Oh those crazy voices are all from Talia. She’s bad at mimicking voices of ridicule and her jokes are completely lame. Don’t feel she’s cute and funny. Phew. I’m not crazy at least. I was wondering how come the druids turned so silly suddenly.

 

Oh hey, there’s an advertisement of: “Bakers WANTED in Maya’s Bakery House!” Oh yes, that lady didn’t fool me. Let’s try to bake some cakes! WOOHOO! \(^o^)/

 

…to be con’d (Chapter 3: Getting Employed III)

 

---

 

Yeah, can’t figure out much humor this time… Sorry! But please say out what do you think this time OK?

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Man, that part with the beggar telling Nick about MP, HP, and GP was hilarious! And the part where Nick said he was going to cast 'Sunshine' on him was brilliant! I mean, it made him sound even more ridiculous as a beggar of new fashion!

 

And I did find Talia funny, at the part where she claimed she would make Nick's life colorful :D

 

Let's see... I found few grammatical errors again! Yay! Example:

 

But why ancient Thais people are silly and nutty?

 

That should be But why are ancient Thais people silly and nutty?

 

I didn't mind other parts, since they were informal, making it laidback, much like how a peasant should be. I think. But anyway, :goodjob: on the chapter, and Nick talking to himself is just pure genius :lol:

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